Words on Relationships

I was guided to pick up a book off my shelf this morning.  I was then guided to open up to a page, and this is what I opened up to.  I have been making some very intentional changes within my own life in the past weeks.  The changes {realizations} I am embracing and shifting within myself are truly changing my relationship with my husband as a result...and in all good ways!  When I opened up and read these pages, it was instant validation that I am living what I believe, and that it does work.  I then immediately felt as if I should share this with my readers as well.  I will quote the section that I was drawn to today, as this may help you along your path, just as it was validation for me.

"Relationships, be they with a spouse, partner, friend, or business associate, are, like everything else in our world, about how we are vibrating.  Period.  And how we are vibrating is coming from how we are feeling.  Period!

That being the case, it's not going to take a genius to figure out that if we're feeling anything other than at peace with ourselves, as well as totally allowing and appreciative of our partner (good luck), our vibrations are going to be slicing away at that relationship, no matter how much we're convinced that since there's nothing wrong with us, it must be the other guy's fault.

If we are verbally or mentally accusing, berating, or disapproving in any way, we are attracting negatively.

If we are feeling trapped, ignored or neglected, unsafe, misunderstood, or short-changed, we are attracting negatively.

If we race to please, rescue, or placate, we are attracting negatively.

And I can already hear the "Yeah, buts":

"Yeah, but you don't know my partner!"

"Yeah, but how would you feel if you had to live with this one or work with that one?"

Now granted, when two people are involved, there are two doing the vibrating, and rarely do those vibrations match.  Nonetheless, we are the sole and exclusive creator of our experience, not our partner, not our parents, not even the boss who just got us fired.

So as hard as it may be to swallow, it becomes a matter of looking at our own valve, our own reactions, our own focus, our own energy flow, because as long as we're glaring somewhere else - past or present- at all the stuff we don't like, not only are we inviting more of the same, we're blocking all the good things we'd like to see in its place.

The bottom line is, if our partner, or anyone else who classifies as a relationship, has some dorky little habits that annoy us (Don't Wants), and we focus on them with even moderately closed valves, all we're doing is perpetuating the dorky habits we'd like to erase, because we're holding them in our vibration.

And therein lies the cause of every downward spiral of any relationship that ever went sour; the relentless-though surly innocent- attention to disagreeable conditions, no matter how meaningless they may appear to be.  As any small, unimportant aggravation begins to snowball into something major from our continued focus and negative energy flow toward it, we'll start to get more of other unpleasant things on that same wavelength, as well as enlarge the petty thing we've been grousing about.  That means not only will that infamous toothpaste cap never get put back on the tube, but that very irritation has the potential, with our constant negative focus, to escalate into an unwanted extramarital affair, a fender bender, a layoff, even a divorce.

"The worse it gets, the worse it gets," remember?  A constant flow of annoyance over anything will, sooner or later, turn ugly.  It must.  Like attracts like.

Sure, when someone is pushing our buttons, every ounce of us wants to push back.  But it's never about what we do in a relationship that equals what we get.  Never!  It's not even about how our partner is flowing energy.  Like everything else in our world, whatever it is we have in our face has come squarely from how we ourselves have been feeling, flowing, and vibrating.

There's just no other way to put it; if you want to change the conditions of your relationship, you're going to have to change your vibrations." (page 201-204)

- Lynn Grabhorn, "Excuse Me, Your Life Is Waiting"


6 thoughts on “Words on Relationships

  1. great timing as I am feeling a low vibration that relates back to issues I had considered resolved. My attempt to raise my vibration on this insecurity is to breathe and try to stay focused in the moment. re-reading this helps to keep me away from my worry! thank you!

  2. boy did this hit hard and slap me in the face…this is exactly what has been bugging me…something that has happened hit me in the face in black and white actually and I m having problem of getting rid of it so this may help…..thx Beth……i haven’t seen anythibg for days cuz I had may last eye surgery and haven’t been on….<3...thx.

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